A technique that children use every single day is a great way to improve client relationships.

Everyone who has kids knows the scene.

Kid: Why is the sky so blue?

Me: Because sunlight interacts with our atmosphere, the sky is blue.

Kid: Dad, what’s the atmosphere like?

Me: The atmosphere refers to the air people, plants, and animals inhale to survive.

Kid: What is the definition of air?

Me: Stop asking me questions !!!#@#!. @Q@$

The length and intensity of the conversation will vary depending on the patience level of the parents.

Kids ask lots of questions. There are many questions. They ask questions all the time. They keep asking questions because it helps them understand the world around them. They want to know the answer.

Asking good questions as an adult is a superpower that’s often overlooked.

Research has shown that good questions build trust, credibility, and empathy among people. “The Surprising Power of Questions” by Alison Wood Brooks & Leslie K. John (Harvard Business Review). This article explains the many benefits of asking questions:

It encourages learning and the exchange between ideas. It also fuels innovation and performance improvement. It builds trust and rapport among team members. It can also help to reduce business risk by exposing unforeseen pitfalls or hazards.

If you are looking to foster innovation, increase performance, build trust and rapport with your clients, it seems like a good place to begin.

What makes a question good? What stops us asking the right questions?

Why are we not asking questions?

Greg Busin explains that “That’s A Great Question: Provocative Queries, Practical Results” identifies five key factors.

• Arrogance Assuming we already know the answer

• Self-centeredness: not caring about what others think

• Fear of embarrassment. The belief that asking questions can reveal ignorance

• Disturbing status quo: The risk of becoming unpopular by asking challenging questions

• Fear of finding the solution: Uncovering an unpleasant truth

You may feel the need to show your expertise to clients in an agency. Contrary to popular belief, you can overcome the need to be an expert and ask a great question instead. Asking good questions will guide you to the right place in your conversation.

What makes for a good question?

Avoid asking questions that ask for yes/no answers. This will ensure you get more detailed responses. You don’t want to be satisfied with a simple yes/no answer. Your client should be open to learning from you. You can start a journey of discovery by asking open-ended questions.

Instead of asking “Will you be the final decision-maker?” which invites a “yes/no” response, ask “Who will be involved with the final decision?”

You can ask your client open-ended questions to learn more about them. Some great examples include:

• Which criteria are the most important for this decision?
• Are there any things about us that concern you?
• Which options are you looking at?
• How can I help you to avoid these risks?
• Which return on investment do you seek?
• Is this the ROI you are missing?

Ask, but don’t ask. Talk less and listen more.

Although it may sound easy, it is not. It takes practice to hear.

Marketing and advertising are opinionated fields. Agency hiring can be based on their opinions, which often leads to less listening and more talking.

“Most people don’t listen with an intent to understand, they listen with an intent to respond.”

People listen only superficially. Instead of paying attention to what is being said, they are too busy trying to understand the message. Once they feel they know where the speaker is going, their attention moves back to what their response will look like.

Chris Voss is a former FBI international kidnapping negotiator. He tells Harvard Business School Online that it is vital to show your willingness to listen.

Voss states that “a lot of people are used to being asked questions and not having to be listened to.” “If you turn them off it gives them permission for you to turn them off.”

Your client will be more inclined to share if you add a sentence like “tell me more”. Listening is the best advice. It will surprise you at the things that you can learn.

Ask follow-up questions

Follow-up questions are the key to understanding. As we have seen, not enough people pay attention to follow-up questions. You must pay attention to the first response, and then build upon that.

• Could you please tell me more?
• What did it do to change things?
• Who was responsible for the decision?
• What was the significance of this?

“The power of follow-up questions is extraordinary. These questions signal to your conversation partner that they are attentive, caring, and eager to learn more. People who are able to ask lots of follow up questions when interacting with their partner tend to feel valued and heard.”

It seems that a solid outcome is to have clients feel respected and heard, while gaining a better understanding of their business.

Let’s go back to the child. As a five-year-old, you intuitively knew that there were no dumb questions. This seems to be a problem as we age.